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We bought a house downtown close to church and shopping. Our families helped us in every way, cleaning and redecorating, making it ready to move into the last part of September 1972. To make it seem like home they gathered for a house warming, bringing goodies and gifts to brighten our new home.

The living room was a depressing blue with dark carpet and drapes. Dad thought they were good enough but we girls helped convince him that the artist in Mom would not thrive there. So they got green carpet, light yellow walls, sheer curtains at the windows. Much nicer, airier and cheerful. Ellen, Nancy, and I helped paint the gray kitchen ceiling white on a blistering hot day.

Frieda Mindrum Nowland

I found that the small north bedroom with two large windows is ideal for my painting hobby.

But one morning in February Palmer woke up and his left leg wouldn’t carry him and his hands felt numb. He stayed five days in the hospital. The doctor said it was a slight stroke. He seemed quite well for a while. Then he started breathing heavy and gaining weight fast. Doctor said he had another slight stroke and fluid had gathered. He has had several light strokes since.

During spring and early summer Palmer gradually failed more and more. I felt so sorry for him. He who had been so full of life, quick, alert, and sure of himself. It was heartbreaking and sad and daily brought tears flowing to see him try so hard to figure things out but his mind and hands would not cooperate. He had always loved to be the manager and caretaker of our home. I missed talking things over with him and felt so helpless trying to take over. But we must be thankful as long as we can work and feel useful. It’s nothing as sad as feeling useless.

With Alf and Ellen’s help I was able to take care of Palmer until January 13 when the doctor wanted him admitted to the hospital. They kept him there 12 days. He must have hed several small strokes while there. He was entirely helpless when we brought him home. I needed lots of help during the two weeks until there was room for him in the nursing home. February 11 Valley View called and said that they had room for him. Now I know he has the best of care. I try to go and see him every day. He seems to be improving some and feels more at home. It is almost impossible to understand what he says except sometimes a clear sentence comes along. Usually that is “Let’s go home” or “Can’t we stay together?”

When I come back to our lonely home I admit some selfish tears blind my eyes.

Maybe we still have a lesson to learn before we are ready for God’s heavenly kingdom. For we know that in all things God works for good with those who love him.

I take my hand, dear Father, and lead thou me
Till at my journey’s ending I dwell with thee.
Alone I cannot wander one single day,
So do thou guide my footsteps on life’s rough way.

SBH #292

On February 6 we received the sad and unexpected news of Nancy’s sudden death. She had undergone heart surgery a week before but was considered out of danger. We will miss Nancy’s gentle grace and sensitivity very much. Our sympathy goes to her three teenage daughters and to Ellert. Nancy was a good wife and mother. They will have many good memories to be thankful for. We pray that our Lord Jesus and God our Father will give them courage and hope and strength to do and say what is good.

My hope is built on nothing less
Than Jesus’ blood and righteousness;
No merit of my own I claim,
But wholly lean on Jesus’ Name.
On Christ, the solid rock, I stand;
All other ground is sinking stand.

When he shall come with trumpet sound,
O may I then in him be found,
Dressed in his righteousness alone,
Faultless to stand before the throne!
On Christ, the solid rock, I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand.

SBH #385

How time flies. Now most of our grandchildren are teenagers or over. It seems like such a short time since a flock of starry-eyed little tots were gathered around our Christmas tree and could hardly wait until it was time to open gifts.

While getting ready for Christmas it often puzzled me how two people in their 70’s can feel so thrilled at Christmas. It isn’t glitter, toys, lights, or gifts. No, it’s hearing again the familiar Christmas carols and the old, old story that God loved us so much he sent Jesus to be our Savior. Christmas and Easter never change. God’s love is always the same. That is what is so comforting for us who have slipped far past the half hundred mark. Things seem to be changing too fast. It’s almost like riding on an escalator — be ready to step off!

I like these lines by Dr. Rogness.

Christmas may be past, but our Lord walks with us step by step into the unknown future. “We fear not” because the echo of angel song, “Fear not” rings in our ear. A new year may bring new sorry, new triumphs, new joys. We enter the new year with courage for he promised to be with us always even to the very end.

At times it was hard for me to believe that God would bother with one like me. But how comforting God’s word is that it is helpless sinners like us he came to save. I’m convinced God’s Holy Spirit led us back on safer ground time and again in the past.

The year after Palmer retired from his job as janitor at the high school I’ll admit I worried about our unsure income and not getting ends to meet. A year later when we were offered the job as caretakers of the churches and cemetaries [sic] I was ashamed and sorry for having had such little faith. I realized how God in by-gone years had always turned things for good. At the time we can not see it. But looking back over the years I can truly say God had given us far more than we ever dared hope for.

The words still ring in my mind which the pastor spoke to Kenneth and Catherine (our first granddaughter to get married) as they stood at the altar. “Be thankful for all things.” It’s easy to be thankful when things go as planned, but we were reminded to also give thanks when adversity strikes us because sorrow and hardships are often blessings in disguise.

It makes one almost feel guilty having good food, warmth, and peace when we hear about so much tragedy, suffering, hunger and cold in this world.

Palmer’s helplessness and my loneliness without him might seem like a sad ending to our lives’ story, but we know “the best is yet to be.” We look forward to being called to be with Jesus.

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Next: Epilogue